Plodding along

Plodding along is where I feel I am now.
Plodding, according to the dictionary, means:

adjective

1. slow-moving and unexciting.

   
   

   "a plodding comedy drama"

   • (of a person) thorough and hard-working but lacking in imagination or intelligence.

     
     

     "plodding, methodical Ralph Bellamy"

So why am I in this category?
At times I certainly feel thorough, hard-working and lacking in imagination or intelligence, therefore yes?
Especially so when the back pain from fractures in my spine are stopping me from simply straightening up, not even standing up, never mind walking...
There is also the despair and changing mood but I maintain a positive attitude and soldier on.
I am able to do more, not everything but I am less impaired though still quite disabled by it all.
Plodding is a feeling I get that is probably due to the plateau I've reached, certainly a peak of improvement has been attained through thorough and hard-work that has now reached the period of little or no change in my physical, emotional and cognitive difficulties.
Compared to a year ago, where I was in a coma and my life was at risk, there's a massive and impressive improvement. If I compare myself against what I consider normality, I would say I am 60% of the way there.
Am I being ungreatful?
I don't think so. I love life and I am propelled to getting better by the love and support from family and friends. I am so thankful to have them all. They've fought for me, with me and pushed me all this way but I am still wanting more. Not from them but certain from me.

I used to wear a suit and tie, nicely polished shoes and dressed for success. Now I wear comfortable, supportive lace-less, slip on shoes, jeans and t-shirt, jumpers etc. They are still clean and smart but it's a way from where I 'power dressed'. Then again, I am retired so no real need to wear a suit to walk Rosie to the park or plod along at home.
I am unable to wear lace ups because I struggle to get to my feet... I can't reach them. They are an appendage too far!
Hence one of my 'sillier goals' is to be able to wear one of my lovely suits, lace up shoes, tie and shirt.. Take Julie out for a posh, romantic meal.
Months ago, our son Sean asked me what I wanted to achieve in losing some of the weight I'd gained from the sedentary life I had now acquired.
Same goal but with March 23rd as a goal date because it would be our 35th wedding anniversary. Reality is we can at least get a nice meal in a restaurant but I may not look as dashing as I aimed to be... Although I would be there and this was a tremendous success and personal journey of hard graft but still only a little way over half the way there.

Many years ago, I was on a conference when I worked for Astra Pharmaceuticals that later became AstraZenecca. We were in the Algarve, Portugal.
One of the speakers was Frank Dick, the former director of coaching for UK athletics. He was a powerful and inspirational speaker. Among the many things he said, he spoke about 'Valley people' and 'Mountain People'.
Valley people, are happy with their lot and never seek to improve on what they have. Mountain people are the polar opposite, they achieve one goal, climbing that mountain, they are not happy with this and push themselves to climb the next mountain and so on. Now their is nothing wrong with either, though as a Mountain person, I cannot be satisfied with my lot  though circumstances push me to, I need to carry on climbing

Beauty and art

Here is my latest piece of art I have produce ...
The subject, my youngest granddaughter in her little bear dressingown
It is a monochrome piece, watercolour - blue and white only
A great subject and a beautiful model... I enjoyed painting this one 😍

Family visits

My cousin Jessie and her youngest daughter, Jenna, came to visit today. It was great to catch up over a few hours of chat, laughs and memories.

It's Jessie's birthday tomorrow and I cannot believe it's been 'that many years' since I held her in my arms as a young lad myself... She was only a couple of days old and just been sent home from the maternity unit in Gibraltar.

All these decades later, we remain tight and closer than ever in our exile in the East of England... Self exile BTW.

She is the mother to two wonderful young ladies, Anya and Jenna.
It's hard to accept the 'little ones' are in their teens now. They were my 'testing crowd' for my material. Little jokes, stories and magic tricks I'd put them through (sorry girls).
Julie and I honed our grandparenting skills on them. Although not officially our grandkids, we treated them like they were. Taking them to places, testing our pram skills and enjoying every minute with them.

They are too old to stay at our house now, like they used to.. It's not hip. We used to lie in bed and make up stories, adding bits to the story line as we went along until the story was no longer what it set out as... Like a story line chinese whispers.
However, should they need to, they are always welcome.

They are great kids and have wonderful parents in Jessie and Tony and we are always there for each other...
We may not have lots of money, fast cars, flash jewellery etc but we have pride, love and family... Xxx

Life is not all bad at times ...

A gorgeous, sunny valentines day in England, my temperature gauge said 11c. Quite remarkable, considering it was freezing cold and snowy a little while ago.

Rosie has been out in the garden laying down as I collected up dog poop (well I can't say shit as I don't know who is reading this...).

Brilliant isn't it... Rosie, Smudge and Jim have been capping away in the back garden and I have to pick it all up!
I should have joined them, pooping in the garden, then I'd feel less peeved!
It's a good thing I can't bent too well because it all looked revolting. However, it would be a wired world if dog poo was 'nice'...

Despite the plethora of crap, the atmosphere is quite relaxing and spring-like as the sun shines down and nature blossoms.
There are loads of beautiful birds  singing away, celebrating the abundance of sun. So, are we over that weather hump now?
I fear not.
I've know it to snow much later than this... Well even last year, when I woke up from my coma in late March, I could see snow out of the ward windows through my blurry eyes.

However, it's Valentines day and I wrote Julie a card and she did one for me.. Yes, after 35 years of marriage, our love is solid and strong. Its endured many troublesome times, and no doubt there will be a few more but do you know what? We are there for each other and as the years add up, I am so pleased we are growing old together and have a great family that has blossomed from our branch of the family tree.
We have not only joined families together but also cultures. We've loved together, fought together and laughed together. We have forged our strong unit and produced two more generations thus far... So pretty good work wouldn't you agree?

So I agree, this is an over commercialised day, so no flowers bought!
It is a chance though to stop, take stock and see how lucky and beautiful life can be...

Anyway, her card: was wonderfully written as always, full of sentiment, it brought tears of joy to my eyes and an ache in my heart... I am blessed!

So with this in mind I will take this opportunity, seeing as it's my blog anyway, to say 'Happy Valentines Day Julie' and I wish everyone will have the chance of long lasting love and happiness... X

A perfect weekend so far

What makes a perfect weekend?
It's waking up to and with, a smile. That lust for life and joy at being alive and sharing the moments.
We have seen all our sons (3), all our daughters-in-law (3) and our four grandchildren
Their laughter, smiles and quick learning is amazing and we are blessed to have such a wonderful immediate family as well as our extended family
Together, they make a dynamic team and we love them to bits... Family is precious, we need to learn to love and enjoy them for what  we are together. Amazing  ❤️❤️❤️
Thank you

Balance, karma maybe?

Sunday is a day to recover and recharge your batteries and Monday is hectic for those in employment ... So retirees should get some rest? Not in this household!

We are up early, no lay in , up with the lark, and looking after 2 of our gang. Daisy is with us all day and Heath comes just after 12,for lunch and joins his sister in some lunch, games and.... Sweeties with the grandparents!

Today, we had a visit from a friend and work colleague, Jane.
She arrived laden with sweets, flowers and a big hug for us all.
We hadn't seen each other since February last year so there was a lot of catching up to do.
Julie and I enjoyed the visit, it was great to have a couple of hours of socialising, catching up with gossip, laughing and showing off the grandkids, with plenty of tea and coffee flowing.

Jane had to go and collect her daughters and as they live in a neighbouring town, left early enough to avoid the traffic.

The summary of this is that although I have retired, I keep in touch with all my friends. Its an aspect of work I miss but I enjoy catching up with colleagues whilst still carrying out grandparents duties.
Life balance?

By 7pm... We are asleep on the sofa, energy zapped out by our little munchkins

Catch up at High tea.

It was such a brilliant catch up with good friends / colleagues yesterday.

Catriona was chauffer for me, picking me up from home and then Penny and driving us to a posh tearoom in a boutique hotel near Ongar... Due to PMI (Poor Memory Issues) I cannot tell you the name of the place but it was extremely chilled and very posh!
We were shown into a large conservatory, sitting at a table which was set with emaculate precision.
The cutlery sat welcoming and clean, awaiting the food to be served.
I noticed and older colleague of ours sat to my left and I turned, smiled and briefly chatted with her, Janet.
Janet was a health visitor who'd worked in the same offices as we had about 5 years + ago. She'd retired and asked "have you retired now?"... I wonder if the walking stick and my gait prompted her question or do I look really old anyway?
No need to answer this one, I know!!!

After a catch up, we had our tea served... Tea with scones, cakes and sandwiches (with the crust cut off), served in a timely manner and with a smile.

I hadn't seen Julia, Penny or Catriona for many months so there was a lot to catch up on.
We have worked together for many years and have been good friends, all of us are specialist nurses in different disciplines but all forward thinking.
We have always done what is best for our patients and colleagues and I was very proud to be their manager for a few years too.

Two main reasons for our meeting: I had retired and now Penny was retiring.
It was like we'd only seen each other the day before... Lots of chat, laughs and memories shared.

Tea was great, lots of choices of tea, I went for the ceylon (Sri Lanka) tea... Strong and full bodied. All poured through a tea strainer as the tea was loose leaf tea.. Catriona!
She kept on forgetting about this, in all fairness, she is the younger one out of us all and usually never drinks hot beverages of any sort!

The sad fact about our meeting is that two of us, by today, will have retired.

Penny has always been the consummate professional. Caring, unpreterbed and calming, in all the years I've known her, I'd say I've only seen her angry once and that was only angry with a tiny 'a'...
She has done so much for her service, single handedly being a force for effective cardiac rehab in West Essex. I have a lot of praise and respect for Penny. She will be missed but she has given many, many years service to others and now it's time for herself, family and especially her grandson. Good luck Penny 😉👍.

We chatted for ages, sharing photos of our children and grandchildren with anecdotes to boot... Sharing tales of our ailments and how different the patient experience is.
It is such a shame that we shared poor parent experience when receiving care!

Time passing quickly and soon the previously bright conservatory becoming darker as dusk set in. It was a good 3 hours gone quickly though there was nearly a year to catch up on.

It was time to say goodbye and although our daily interactions will never be the same, our respect and  can I say love, for our colleagues and friends, will always be there.

There were a few cakes left over so I was obliged to take them home for our grandchildren to polish off... Boy did they enjoy them! Especially as Daisy wasn't feeling well so the cakes were very much a Medicinal must.!

Till the next time
Cheers....

Life after encephalitis... The book

As part of my coming to terns with my broken brain, my wife purchased this book.
I have read it in stages and recommended this to all healthcare professionals that may deal with this and patients / carers.

Life After Encephalitis: A Narrative Approach (After Brain Injury: Survivor Stories) by Ava Easton.

Click on the authors name to take you to the link.

Encephalitis and me...

Apologies for not posting much over the last 6 months.
The reason being, a stay in intensive care, unconsciousness, in an induced comma, waking up confused, dazed and scared, festooned with tubes everywhere and no recollection as to why.
Its been a  sereal journey. The time since has been hard.

One day I am Ram, the next moment, a shell of who I was... Gloomy yes but that's what it felt like.
From being free and able bodied to being dependent on many people, predominantly my wife Julie.
One day, I had influenza, next I'm waking up two weeks later in intensive care????
I'm slowly getting back to myself but there is still a way to go...

Life's been very busy with recovery and physio, memory issues and lots of tests, investigations and  reviews by all sorts of specialists. Then there has been all the exercise, 'strengthening my core' due to the vertebral fractures I have...

No idea when or how I got these but, they are there.

I don't think there's any orifice that's not been scoped or organ that has been radiologically checked out by xray or scan.... The barrage of blood tests I've had is also remarkable that I've not needed a unit or two of blood to replace the 'arm fulls' of claret extracted from my thrombosed veins!!

I've become a patient and it is truly eye opening to be in this position.
I'm in the process of chronicling it and maybe making an attempt at writing a true story about this all. The Encephalitis Society have been very helpful to Julie, my family and myself giving us support and direction. I am indebted to them all, especially Julie who has given me the love and support I have not always returned as well as the strength to carry on. Thank you xxx.
My boys and their wives as well as my sister in law Val and brother in law Tony, as well as my mother and father in law Claire and Henry, who have been there for me. Becks and Mo for their help as well as Ambe, for his help and guidance during the acute phase... My mum, dad, brother and sister who came over when I was ill and all my friends Alan and Helen, Douglas and Irene, Jim, Linda, Jill, Catriona..... The list goes on, Cheers!!
To all my fellow Dr's and nurses who got me over this rather unplanned and dark hump, I thank you all.

I know this may read like an acceptance speech at an award ceremony but in a way it is. It is in deed an award of thanks from me to you all.

As a family, all the help, encouragement and direction we have received from everyone has been humbling and fantastic. The hard work from community services, Louise and Magda as well as the GP services, Nuffield House and Debbs has been amazing to Julie and I. The NHS is a great institution and I have given so much for so many years to it but it has paid me back when I needed it. Thank you 😌 (I'm not very good at choosing the appropriate EMOGI).
Anyway, having this perspective of healthcare professional to patient may be worthwhile to undertake, especially for me!
I'm in a space I hope no one gets to experience... I appreciate the alternative is RIP but this is not a bed of roses either.
Despair, pain and anger need to be managed and I am not always good at it.
Society imposes on us to be strong as men and as professionals... This is not always easy but hayho, life goes on.

It's not been all bad: I got to see the world cup 2018 on TV even though the team I was backing came third... Though most important of all, I got to meet our fourth grandchild, the beautiful little lady Eliza, who joins Heath, Cass and Daisy as the new leaves in our ever expanding family tree.

I have been writing a little, reading even less but painting and drawing a lot... One of my friends helped me conjure up the word 'Encephalartist'... I don't think it's been used before and I'm going to take the bizzare honour of claiming it... 😁

In the meantime, I leave you with some of my art... And a promise to get some more posts in sooner than they have appeared lately.
In the meantime, enjoy the rest of the summer, reading and creating life.... I hope you consider reading one of the books available on Amazon
If you do, please leave a review and make sure you tell others that these books exist and are in the public domain to be read and enjoyed by everyone.

Peace and love 😘

Busy few weeks...

It's been a hectic and chaotic few weeks with winter, in respiratory disease management, our busy period.

Added to this there have been a myriad of project deadlines, business case completions, service spec reviews, performance, information governance, ACP /STP.. TLA (Three Letter Abreviations) ... And we are putting our house on the market.
The latter is what I wanted to share with you.

I love my house, its a fair size, 5 double bedrooms, a massive living room, separate massive dining room, big conservatory, 2 bathrooms and a modern, open plan kitchen that you can swing several cats in... You are getting the idea it is Roomy?
Outside there is room to park 3 cars and the back garden is massive, private, not overlooked and warm.

So why move?
Well it's too big!!

We have brought our family up here and seen our children marry, live with us and then move on. Now it's just Julie and I in this BIG house.
We have invested a lot of money and time but most of all, love, into our house.
It is why it's so. Hard to find something that will ever replace this homely space.
There is something about our home that makes me want to stay and not go. The space, light, warmth and physicality added to the memories make it difficult to part. This house has been an important part of our family. We have shared many good times, some challenging ones too, but the good far outweigh the not so good... And none were ever bad!

As we search, I compare against what we have and what we would be sacrificing for the sake of downsizing...

The search continues...

Cold, rainy days and dark evenings are back

The summer seems to be over, at least it feels this way in the UK.
The warmth of the day is less obvious as the temperature seems to have plummeted by a few degrees.
The evenings have drawn in as we now contend with the questions 'do we turn the heating on'?
Well with every cloud, there's a silver lining... I will now be more determined to finish the book I am writing.
What is it!?
Well it's the third part to the Mental Dental (MBP) series.
Yes, more thrilling adventures for Dr Jessie Stack as she faces the dangers of wrestling with psychopathic killer dentists.

So I hopefully will be able to complete the task I have set ahead and will publish in the coming months.
In the meantime, the summer may not be a distraction anymore but I have paid work, family and especially my gorgeous grandchildren to keep me from pen and paper.

Onwards and upwards

Hilarious belly laughs aplenty

3pm: The phone rang incessantly with the urgency of the pre-programmed ringtone. “Vivaldi’s Four Seasons”, a relaxing piece of music, spoilt by the lack of bass, tone and instrumentation the cheap speaker granted.
Frances finally picked the receiver up. ‘Hello?’ she enquired.
After a few seconds, her facial expression changed and a desperate ‘No you are kidding’ accompanied her sudden change in mood.
‘Can they do that at this stage?’ she asked the caller.

Pierce was anxiously gesticulating and mouthing out ‘who is it?’ and ‘what is wrong?’ but to no avail.

Frances was busy in conversation, trying her best to ignore him and concentrate on the conversation on the phone. She eventually gestured for him to give her some space and he left her to it, unable to imagine what was to follow… he obliged, knowing only too well it was not worth getting in-between Frances and her phone calls.

Prior to this call, all had been upbeat and chirpy in the Farley household. Their up and coming, eagerly awaited annual holiday was finally around the corner, they were due to leave in a matter of hours.
‘It’s been a long few months, we need a long and relaxing break and this year we are going away with my sister and her family’ Frances exclaimed.
‘The boys are getting older and when we next know it, they will be off to university, getting married and will want to go on holiday on their own’ she continued.
‘I want us to do something exciting and fun’.
Pierce nodded his head and smiled, agreeing with his wife’s suggestion of a fun holiday. Summer holiday are a period of rest and fun with a chance to recharge ones batteries and face life with rejuvenated vigour.

The annual vacation had been many months in preparation in order to get it right. With children to cater for and entertain, the two families needed everything to be just right especially as this was the first holiday in the 21st century.

However things start to go desperately wrong as the comedy tragedy develops.

Hilarity in the Hills... Is based on a true story.
It's not fiction as such but has been embellished a little for poetic licence.

It's a sweet and unassuming read with giggles and belly laughs to boot.

Please read it,  experience it and review it...

Available on Amazon Kindle and paperback format.
Go onto my author page and enjoy
Rams Author page

Tweet tweet

Take a look at @Author_man_ram's Tweet: https://twitter.com/Author_man_ram/status/760931863443759104?s=09

Hilarious book

Inside the novel...

Hilarity in the Hills,  a sweet story of family fun, lampooning in France and catastrophic vacationing.

Simon held on to his dad’s hand as they crossed the road and headed for the hustle and bustle of the French market. They looked for anything resembling a food establishment and they were soon standing in front of a stall piled high with lovely cold meats. Salamis of all kinds of sizes and colours. Pierce made some quick calculations in his head: ‘They would be easy to eat without any plates or cutlery’ so Pierce addressed the stall owner in his best French, pausing to be able to ensure he was correctly addressing the gentleman in the correct tense. ‘Quelle est cette saucisse s'il vous plaît ‘ asked pierce whilst pointing at a lovely sausage on the counter. ‘Cheval’ replied the stall owner with a smile on his face. Well he had understood his question but the answer was not what he expected, although the salami looked very appetising, it was Horse meat and no way was he eating Neddy. ‘Quelle est cette saucisse s'il vous plaît’ he asked again but pointing to another salami. The answer was the same but without the smile this time… ‘Cheval’. Simon now started to tug on his confused dads arm, as he whispered ’Dad, dad’ but to no avail. He continued to attempt to gain his father’s full attention however Pierce was concentrating. Pierce looked at him, firmly stating ‘Please Simon, can’t you see I am trying to buy us lunch, let me focus on speaking to this man in French. It’s not easy you know’. ‘But dad, look up at the sign…’ Pierce capitulated to his son’s request and looked up at the sign on the stall. The bright, clearly written and colourful sign firmly stated “Bouocherie de cheval” and to make matters clearer, there was a picture of a horse with lines and writing on its body which indicated what the different cuts were called on the equine meat platter. ‘Pardon monsieur, jei sui Désolé’ said the embarrassed father of three and grabbed his sons hand and walked to another stall. ‘Ah, cheese, no horses in there I hope unless they milk horses here?’ he chuckled to his young apprentice and proceeded to purchase some fromage instead.

Infants fun and educational book

Extending my portfolio of books, I have written and illustrated a book for infants.
It is called I Don't Like It
It is a pre-school / early years easy read for the parents to read with the child.
It is about learning to eat new foods and trying new flavours / textures, aimed at the difficult eaters.
It will be fun without the drag of a difficult dining experience that some families suffer.
The inspiration for this was my nephew, who for many years, was only eating chicken nuggets and chips!
No Fruit, no veg, no other meats, just chicken nuggets and chips!
A few tweaks are needed and then, it will be available for all to read, hopefully as an interactive book on kindle, but also as a colour paperback.
As I said, the illustrations will be mine too...
Exciting...
Here is the working cover:

Holiday hell or hilarious consequences?

When a trip to the alps goes wrong and a family end up elsewhere in France, the options are laugh or cry.
Join the misadventures that occur to the families as they try to enjoy the vacation, despite being in a different venue than planned. 

It's based on true experiences, however scripted they seem, they actually happened.
Hilarity in the Hills... A story of fun, creativity and chaos. 

Hilarity in the Hills is a light read and suitable for all ages, although a few swear words are scattered in the text, however quite appropriately dealt with.

I hope you do not all have a similar story to tell, but there are elements in everyday life that just have to be shared, this one is definitely one of those. 

Book link

Hilarious book

Readable and fun
The new book is out and available on both physical and ebook.
It's realistically priced too and you can enjoy this summer romp today by downloading it on kindle or in a couple of days by buying the paperback.

Click on the link above and make your choice. 

It's already 1209 on the kindle store, Humour category... so can't be bad!
Once read,  please let others know what you thought of it by leaving a review.

Click away

Lottery dreams at pre-Christmas

Lottery
UKllottery dreams are alight again.  A rollover waiting to be won.
So what if you were lucky enough to be the big winner?
Surely this would be a dream come true?
Legally Lucky is a fictitious twist to the aspirations of money and all its trappings...
It will take you to the world of the winner and reflect the truth about the fact we are all winners.  Life is enough to be happy although money helps but it's not the be all and end all.
Money is not everything and this book highlights the joy of family, love and friendship as the  true treasures.
Read it and start to live life for what it is hhowever, good luck with the lottery...

My new grandson

A  new addition to our family.  Blessed to have welcomed Castiel Gulrajani today.
Our second grandson.
Congratulations to Keiron and Aga and hello little dude.

Money makes the world go round

Would loads of money enrich your life?
Having millions in the bank accomplish and complete you?
Is this a driver in your life?

If the answer to these questions is yes,  then you need to read Legally Lucky...

My first book directly challenges this and will hopefully inject a different outlook on life.

There are more precious things in life like love, friendship and family.
The twists and turns in this story are all encompassing and entertaining to boot.

It's got some great reviews and it was what propelled me to write more.

This book is different and has been likened to In the pursuit of happiness... It's a spellbinding read that will leave you wanting more.

Well you'll be glad to know there are more.
Different books and stories like Phobic Wars, Mental Dental (MBP) & Phantasms in the Infirmary.

Check them out on my amazon author page